The Twilight Report

So, speaking of phones, I just watched this ad where Dustin Hoffman is trying to talk to someone on a mobile about not buying a house at any price (the message that goes through is that the person on the other end should buy the house at any price). Dustin is upset over the miscommunication, and someone tells him, “This wouldn’t happen in Australia.”

It’s a Telstra ad, and I don’t think they are any worse than any other large corporation, but it made me laugh because my first thought was, “yeah, everything is better in Australia.”

...even though the example they actually cited wasn’t a very good one.

Yikes! I have to vote tomorrow and I have no idea who to vote for, or even who is going to be on the ballet, aside from my current state MP. He is part of the opposition conservative Liberal party and it is apparently a marginal seat, meaning it’s a bit like I live in Ohio (except not as flat, and the beach is not as far away), so the vote might have an actual impact. There were no less than three helpful posts to sydneysiders today with useful information on finding out how and where to vote, but I am still confused. I felt like I was much better informed about the issues and candidates when I was living in New York.

Cairns, Day 1

Day 1 of Cairns actually started at 4:00am in Sydney. We took the red-eye to Cairns, which required getting the very first train into the city from Artarmon. e can attest that flying makes me grumpy. Flying on no sleep doubly so.

btw- I would like to thank e for still being my friend after having to fly with me :P

After checking in and checking out the resort, we took a taxi into town and had over priced sea food. The view was nice, but I vowed that I would not spend $30 on bad food again this trip. I can eat five or six times for that much usually... and it’s better.

Cairns, Day 2

Quicksilver cruise to the Great Barrier Reef where we went snorkeling. This was, for me, the highlight of the Cairns trip, as I had not been snorkeling since the last time I was in Cairns which was about 15 years ago! Still the whole experience left me feeling that I had been hermetically sealed from reality. I think it would have been better to have gotten a smaller boat that didn’t go out so far and spent more time snorkeling.

Cairns, Day 3

The third day we did smallish bus tour around areas south of Cairns. Our tour guide was obviously a local bloke who was highly entertaining. I often wish I could sound Australian like that. We got to see some of the devastation which Cyclone Larry had brought in March of last year. We also got to see this crazy water soluble castle in the tropics, which I think I mentioned in a previous post.

Cairns, Day 4

Our last day in Cairns involved a train ride up to Kuranda, which was lame, followed by some tourist shopping, a so-so meal and the “sky rail” back down the mountain. Sky rail is a fancy name for a gondola. The Gondola was pretty cool way to see the forest, especially since there were two stations to stop at and take a look around, but not worth the hefty price tag.

Then we went to Djabugay World (or whatever it was called), which was a little park dedicated to presenting local indigenous culture to tourists. There was nothing new here for me, except for actually being shown how to throw a boomerang by a true native. I was kind of nervous, but with all the other white people behind a net I made a pretty good throw and it did actually come back to my approximate vicinity.

For dinner we had really nice fish and chips. Actually I had prawn cutlets. There were of course too many chips. There seems to be a correlation between the quality of sea food and the amount of chips. The best fish and chip places seem to have way too many chips. They had fresh sea food in the window (which you can also buy to take home and cook), which also seems to be the mark of a good fish and chips place.

Melbourne, Day 1

After fish and chips we flew to Melbourne and arrived today at 12:30am. Slept in, then I went looking for film. I got to know Melbourne a little better. I haven’t been here since 1999. I have to say, for the whole Sydney/Melbourne rivalry, that Melbourne is a pretty cool city. This is definitely the sort of place that I could live if I knew anyone or if I landed an awesome job here.

All of this, despite the fact that I was born in Sydney and thusly should be biased in favour of Sydney. Sydney does, however, have much better beaches, the opera house and the bridge, so I think I will stick with Sydney for now.

Then the kids went down to see the penguin parade. I wasn’t much interested in seeing penguins so I stayed in the city to check out things here on my own.

I am a big fan of the city circle tram which is free and uses these really old looking trams. I don’t know why, but I really have a thing for old stuff. I have always been a big fan of the old Sydney ferries, even though newer ferries would probably be safer, despite not looking as cool.

So far...

So that is where we are so far. I still have three days in Melbourne, although the last day is only a half day. Then we are back in Sydney and my friends will be headed back for the states. It’s been really wonderful having them visit. I’ve done a bunch of things that I wouldn’t ordinarily do, and I’ve gotten to know Australia a little better.

I am ready for more visitors, so book your tickets today!

This morning I was talking to e on the phone, and she told me that after seven months down under I “have a slight accent.” This made me happy, although I doubt I would fool any Australians. This and the call directly proceeding it to Joe (to plan Project NYE2006, wherein my friends are coming to visit), was the first time I had talked to anyone in America since I got here. I finally bought myself a calling card, and it costs me like 4¢ a minute, which is less than it used to cost me to make a long distance call in the US. That is shocking.

Australians no longer sound that odd to me. I expect when I go back to the states that Americans will be the ones to sound odd. Not my friends though. e and Joe don’t count because they just sound like e and Joe, not like Americans, since I know them well. It’s only American strangers that I expect to sound funny.

Today I went to the coast and took a walk along the ocean. It was nice, and it sort of reminded me of February 2005, when I came to Australia for a visit and had this strong desire to just stay after spending a few days in Sydney and Collaroy by the beach. Although now I have a bit of a sunburn, which is no good.

note: for the duration of this entry I will pretend that I am not an American, because that is the only way I could possibly live with myself. I was born an Australian, and still hold Australian citizenship.

Amanda alerted me to the news that the Americans have declared war on Vegemite. Apparently, the cultural imperialists have decided that you can have folate in bread, but not on it. I can sort of understand having a policy banning the commercial import and sale of something; I don’t agree with it in this case, because there doesn’t seem to be a good reason aside from allowing Uncle Sam to turn into a nagging nanny(state). However, according to media reports, Australians entering the states have been searched and had jars of Vegemite intended for personal use confiscated. Other reports have been less consistent. Some say that Vegemite is still being sold in speciality stores in the states, others say the opposite and point out that an on-line retailer of Australian foods in America have ceased sale of Vegemite, some have openly speculated that whole story is a hoax.

I for one hope that it is a hoax, because all though I don’t live in America anymore, the idea not having Vegemite is just too horrible to contemplate. I don’t actually eat all that often, but when I do, it is deeply satisfying, and for my 25 years in the states, it was one of the few Australian things that I had to remind me of home. I sometimes use Vegemite for medicinal purposes: when I have a bad headache or an upset tummy, nothing helps more than a few slices of toast with Vegemite!

The last time they did something like this, Clinton banned Australian lamb. That was an insult, but at least Aussie expats could still have New Zealand lamb, which is arguably just as good. One of the few good things his successor did was lift the ban.

So of course the first thing I did when I got home was have some toast and Vegemite.