Impossible

Ten things which make my job impossible:

1. the basic concept of converting a complicated serial algorithm (which nobody understands well) to run in parallel is flawed
2. none of the people who originally wrote the serial code have been at The Company in years
3. in fact due to massive programmer rotation there are several layers of coding styles involved
4. there is actually one coding style-aspect which is persistent: poor to non-existent documentation
5. Adil and I are the only ones who has any motivation to keep parallel abstraction working
6. parallel code is, by its very nature, fragile, and developers who don't have any motivation to keep it working are going to break it
7. Jeff says "zeroth order" too often, making me want to slap him
8. generally Jeff opens his mouth far too often
9. the customers have unrealistic expectations about what parallel will actually do for timing and abstraction
10. and ... most of all BASIC ASSUMPTIONS THAT THEY MADE AND TOLD ME ALL ALONG TURNED OUT TO BE TOTALLY FALSE YESTERDAY.

Before I left to go to Australia I had actually accomplished the impossible. I actually got parallel abstraction to work. As soon as I got back I found out that Jeff had fucked it up. I didn't realize until last night just how badly he had fucked it up. It doesn't matter that he didn't intend to fuck it up; it doesn't make me any less angry at him.

Orphan

To foreigners, a Yankee is an American. To Americans, a Yankee is an Easterner. To Easterners, a Yankee is a New Englander. To New Englanders, a Yankee is a Vermonter. And in Vermont, a Yankee is somebody who eats pie for breakfast. -(an old definition [of Yankee]) Wikipedia article on Yankee

Calling people south of the Mason-Dixon line "Yanks" will probably get the shit beat out of you.

Technology

Out of order? FUCK! Even in the future, nothing works! Dark Helmet in Spaceballs : The Movie

Not Just for Porn Anymore

According to Avenue Q the Internet is "for porn." Apparently the Internet has opened up the market for a new type of venture which I have never seen before:


I urge you to take action, before it is too late.

Update: Just so we're clear, I think this is sick.